Hindsight is a revealing, sometimes embarrassing, and always informative beast.

Xanga is my ultimate form of hindsight.

After reading through this weblog that I was once achingly faithful to, I feel the need to summarize.

1. Wow...I was once very sure of myself.

2. I was so angsty!

3.I cannot ever get rid of this thing.

4. Technology is scary.

5. I miss feeling blindly impassioned.

I feel a weird, gnawing need for things that are spawned by both nostalgia, and something I still haven't found and have always been looking for.

where the hell am i going in such a hurry?

i am  burnt out.

and that is in no manner a refrence to the amount of drugs i've never used.

i'm just burnt out on evangelical...ish...ness.

i need relationship...ish...ness.

and awe.

and wonder.

and community.

and my best friend.

and a one way ticket to upper middle class.

oh...and some scholarships would be nice.

and someone to challenge me. that hasn't happened in a while.

damn...i must really be screwing this whole sanctification process up...i've pretty much ceased to sanctify.

i'm stuck somewhere between...bored and...and...defiant. and foolish. did i mention bored? the trinity of fecklessness.

feck·less     /ˈfɛklɪs/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[fek-lis] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation

this is OBVIOUSLY my issue.

i wish something would bowl me over here pretty quickly, otherwise i think my zeal may tanker off the coast of africa ( that is, the coast i'll probably never see).

am i the only person who happens to feel a little numb to this whole christianity thing?

i was just wondering.

i am burnt out.

and sooooo stereotypical.